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I have just returned from a leadership retreat, held in the South of England. My role was to facilitate a conversation over two days that explored the essence of what leadership is and how we can all be better leaders.
The venue for the retreat was Leeds Castle, set in the heart of the Kent countryside. This beautiful, Saxon-built castle features an eclectic mix of period architecture from across the centuries. It was once home to King Edward I, founder of the British Parliament, and also King Henry V, who is frequently researched by scholars of leadership.
The assembled group, about 20 of us in total, was also rather eclectic, featuring CEOs, Chairmen, Presidents, Vice-Presidents, Senior Partners, General Council, and knighted captains of industry. The conversation flowed well. Chatham House Rule ensured both confidentiality and honesty. We shared our personal stories. We reflected on triumphs and defeats. We identified lessons learned. We talked about what inspires us, and why we feel called to lead.
As the retreat drew to a close, we acknowledged to each other that we had participated in a conversation full of rich insights and practical help for leading in these especially challenging times. Here is a brief excerpt from my personal notes, which I will call, Five Lessons for Leadership NOW.
Lesson #1: Leadership is not a position; it’s an attitude.
Everyone is a potential leader. A leader is anyone who is willing to “take a lead” in any situation. A leader recognizes that they create the world they live in. The world is an effect; not a cause. We are the ones who cause the effect. And the world changes, when we do. Therefore, one person really can make a difference. An effective leader usually has a good idea of the difference they want to make.
Lesson #2: Leadership looks after the Spiritual DNA.
A leader is someone who is willing to dig deep inside to know who they really are, and what their life is for. They are in search of the “true self”; they are inner-directed; they look after the identity of the organization; they look after the Spiritual DNA; they grow the signature strengths; and they help individuals and organizations achieve authentic success.
Lesson #3: A leader has a vision, and teaches people to see.
A leader has a vision, not just for the next three months, but over the long-term too. They see what is necessary now, and they can also see something of the future. Leaders are the custodians of the vision, and they keep the vision alive in their own mind and in the minds of others. Leadership is about seeing the possibility for something that might not exist yet. A leader is someone who sees possibility in any situation – a possibility for more love, more truth, more honesty, for instance – and thereby helps to bring it into existence.
Lesson #4: It is the JOY of leadership that sustains you.
Leadership is not always easy. You are often the first to fall, the first to be criticized, the first to be accused, the first to be attacked. AND, you have to be willing to be the first to get back on your feet, the first to learn, the first to forgive, and the first to move on. It can be easy to forget “the joy” of what you do; but when you remember “the joy” it can sustain you in all manner of ways.
Lesson #5: Leaders grow, and they keep on growing.
A leader is someone who understands that “we” cannot grow if “I” will not grow. A marriage cannot grow, if I will not grow. A friendship cannot grow, if I will not grow. A team cannot grow, if I will not grow. An organization cannot grow, if I will not grow. Peter Drucker said, “Leaders grow; they are not made.” A leader wants to grow, and that is what makes others want to grow too. Everyday, think about what inspires you, what is real, and what you aspire to – right now.
Today, I watched, along with everyone else in the world, the inauguration of the 44th American President, Barack Obama. Ever since Mr Obama was nominated for the Democratic candidacy, he has conducted himself as a genuine and principled person. Mr Obama has inspired a level of faith and hope in people that is frankly uncommon in politicians. Today, America got a new President, and, even more importantly, the world has a new leader. Because of Mr Obama’s breadth of vision, and his abiding sense of purpose, I believe he will serve the world well. And, therefore, I wish you, Mr Obama, and your family, every success.
The day after Barack Obama won the Presidential election, Alice Walker, the Pulitzer Prise-winning author, poet and activist, wrote the President-elect an open letter. I was deeply moved by Alice Walker’s letter, and have since shared it with hundreds of people who have attended my seminars. In her letter, Alice Walker offers wise counsel to Mr Obama on the challenges of leadership and the difficult times ahead. You can read the full transcript The Root, or, if you like, see her read the letter on Democracy NOW, a daily radio/TV show.
Here, I will share an excerpt from Alice Walker’s letter, which highlights the integral relationship between personal happiness and true success. It reads:
I would advise you to remember that you did not create the disaster that the world is experiencing, and you alone are not responsible for bringing the world back to balance. A primary responsibility that you do have, however, is to cultivate happiness in your own life. To make a schedule that permits sufficient time of rest and play with your gorgeous wife and lovely daughters. And so on. One gathers that your family is large. We are used to seeing men in the White House soon become juiceless and as white-haired as the building; we notice their wives and children looking strained and stressed. They soon have smiles so lacking in joy that they remind us of scissors. This is no way to lead. Nor does your family deserve this fate. One way of thinking about all this is: It is so bad now that there is no excuse not to relax. From your happy, relaxed state, you can model real success, which is all that so many people in the world really want. They may buy endless cars and houses and furs and gobble up all the attention and space they can manage, or barely manage, but this is because it is not yet clear to them that success is truly an inside job. That it is within the reach of almost everyone.
When I read these words, I felt like Alice Walker had written them for me. In my work with Success Intelligence and The Happiness Project, I have learned that, happiness creates success. In other words, when you cultivate a sense of joy inside yourself it helps you to access a whole new level of inspiration, talent, resilience, and support. Success can lead to happiness; but most of all, happiness leads to success. Psychology research backs this theory. Longitudinal studies, which follow the well-being of people over many years, show that inner happiness helps to promote career success, loving relationships, good health, financial prosperity, and a rich spiritual life. Your inner happiness is the key to authentic success.
Alice Walker goes on to talk about leadership, forgiveness, and the need to lighten and brighten our world. She finishes her open letter to Barack Obama with the words: “We are the ones we have been waiting for.” Her letter is really addressed to us all.
While Mr Obama takes his Presidential oath, and makes his acceptance speeches, let us use this occasion to reflect on how we can take a lead in our own lives. On some level, we are all world leaders, because on some level we all create the world. My prayer for today, therefore, is that we may all step forward so as to be even more of the person we came to be.
And so be it.
